missionaries and mercenaries

August 7, 2008 - Dar es Salaam, Tanzania

OK we are back in the internet cafe where we wrote our frst blog, just finalazing the details of the last leg of our trip. All things being well we will be in the serengeti this time next week fending off attacks from hungy lions. wich may not be too much of an exageration as the news from that area is that this year a suprising amount of the locals have been killed, I heard someone say it was because the natives have taken all of the Lions natural prey so they shouldnt really be blamed. Also fending for ourselfs shouldnt be a problem as frank mentioned I am now in possession of a massive crocodile dundee style knife! very manly!

However, all of that is in the future. since we last wrote we have been in the near wilderness of northern mozambique. Slowly (mostly because of the dirt roads) we made our way to the isle of Mozambique, a UNESCO world heritage site it was well worthy of this accolade the place was amazing we pitched tent (always nice and cheap!) on the mainland and decided to walk the 3.5km across the bridge every morning. my bank balance appreciated it, my legs however, did not. Its probably the most exercise I have ever done ever. on the island there are 3 free museum's a fort and some nice seafood restraunts, but that really doesnt do it justice.

Our camping spot was an interesting place ran by an ever friendly Indian who kept going on about how clean the beach was, not entirely true,as we saw a small boy do a poo one morning and wash his bum in the surf!! dirty bugger, there was also some dog poo so he must have thought we were blind and couldnt smell, the dogs were a major annoyance they kept sleeping in the porch area of our tent and growling at each other at all hours, so me and frank would "gently" kick them to move them on if they got too rowdy. well one night after alot of growling and whining and all sorts of weird noises. and after a few gentle kicks I opened the tent door and wacked the noisey bitch with an empty plastic bottle, that did the trick she ran off.... and left a load of slimy puppies and dog placenta all over our tent door. We still havnt been able to get the smell of dog birth of the thing, looks like its gonna be traded before we leave. as a footnote disgusting things seem to be a recurring theme for me as on a bus journey a couple of weeks ago a woman casualy as anything threw up on my shoe. I dont think its taboo to vomit on someone in Africa.

After Ilha de Mozambique we travelled up the coast of the Indian Ocean too the resort town of Pemba. we could have easily have been on the cote d'azur or on the portugese coast due to the style of buildings and the language and the awesome beaches, oh also the amont of white folk there were mostly expats ive never seen so many since London a couple of months ago. we stayed at the famous, (in expat circles) Russels place with the intention of leaving after 2 nights at the most. this didnt happen due to a number of things firstly drunk taxi drivers are not reliable, neither are Casio alarm clocks, or Taxi drivers reccomended by ex-mercenaries. we were beggining to feel like we were at hotel california. people who seemed to be permanent residents there looked at us strangely each morning we were still there, even the bar man was laughing at our misfortune each morning we ordered breakfast and opened up a new tab. still though our time there was not wasted we got talking to the strangest people including god fearing missionaries who try to subtly talk to you into going to one of their meetings an ex-mercenary who has had more wild experiences than ive had hot dinners incuding

1. killing for money, Im not endorsing it, only saying its pretty wild.

2. being banned from america after working as security for one of fidels commandantes

3. slapping an elephant on the bum

4. stealing the daughter of the senator of utah from her husband, husband no 1. was also a congressman!)

the list goes on

crazy person number two is a lebeneese born australian muslim who has renounced his faith and is now a Rasta, (dreadlocks included) who after his divorce is now travelling the world (41 countries so far) with the intent of going to the Hague in holland to file a war crimes lawsuit against John Howard for his involvement in the Iraq war - all this at 63!

so when groundhog day eventually ended we found ourselfs on the back of a pickup again for a 6 hour journey to mocambia de praia with the paranoid rasta in tow. from there we travelled to the border with Tanzania, something I personally had not been looking too. only because of the drip of inormation i had heard about the place. mostly about people being killed by lions and during the ferry crossing across the river your canoe driver changing his mind about the price and threatening to cut of your arms or pay $100. when we got there and it all went swimmingly I was rather relieved and even enjoyed the border crossing on our little leaking boat. one night in Mtwara (where joy of joys running water, not hot but beggars cant be choosers.) which makes nearly 25 places and we were off again by coach (10 hours) to Dar es Salaam were we are now a little wiser but no worse for ware. here is a list of the places we have stayed at frank doesnt want me to put it up, but he wrote the damn thing (and many other lists so here it is.)

1. YWCA. DAR

2. KIPEOPO VILLAGE. DAR

3. BANGARI LODGE. STONE TOWN

4. JAMBO BROS. NUNGWI

5. WHITE SANDS. KENDWA

6. YWCA (AGAIN) DAR

7. TAZARA (TRAIN)

8. SANGILLO. CHITIMBA

9. MZUZUZOO. MZUZU

10. BUTTERFLY SPACE. NKHATA BAY

11. MANGO DRIFT. LIKOMA ISLAND

12. MAYOKA VILLAGE. NKHATA BAY

13. DOOGLES. BLANTYRE

14. CHIWEMBWE. ROB & CHRIS' HOUSE

15. MANJA. NYUTI'S HOUSE

16. CHIWEMBWE. ROB AND ALEX'S HOUSE

17. PENSAO MASSINGA. MANDIMBA

18. PENSAO SAN MIGUEL. CUAMBA

19. HOTEL LURIA. NAMPULA

20. PENSAO NAMPULA. NAMPULA

21. CURISANA CAMPING. ISLE OF MOZAMBIQUE

22. RUSSELLS PLACE. PEMBA

23. PENSAO RESIDENTIAL MAJID. MOCAMBIA DE PRAIA

24. CAVAPIDA GUESTHOUSE. MTWARA

25. KIBODYA HOTEL. DAR

TONIGHT 26. YMCA. DAR (THE YWCA WAS FULLY BOOKED!)

Well i think that is it not much really else to say except see you all in 19 days, and if there is anyone of you kind souls willing to collect us from heathrow on the 26th of august please get in touch.

Love you lots and lots with jelly tots, Lawrence and Frank


Pictures

Palace of something or other. and statue
big anchor
frank relaxes
the long walk
 
 

2 Comments

mum:
August 14, 2008
Hi boys We all read your blog last night at Sean and Dot's house-loved it, especially the puppy/placenta story!
Hope the Safari is everything you hoped for.
Take care and enjoy!
May 18, 2010
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