When Rape is Inevitable....

June 3, 2012 - Lake Junaluska, North Carolina, United States

"When rape is inevitable...just relax and enjoy it." Now that I have your attention...please notice the quotation marks! I didn't say this, someone else did! LOL I'm quoting my late Father in law...a 2 star General in the US Air Force...as well as an MD....a Flight Surgeon. It's important that you know this so you can appreciate the history behind his wonderful quips....he had a profound gift of the gab. He was bigger than life...and until his death at age 96 he still commanded respect and attention....whenever he was in the room.

His politically incorrect quip perhaps rivals those of Randy (found on this blog).....but it's perfect for my current situation. I feel raped by my bank....but I'm certainly not enjoying it! I want to blow off some steam, but once a therapist, always a therapist....so I want to do this in a constructive and therapeutic way....as much as possible. I've found that finding a way to blend in humor in the midst of dealing with my own anger.....works well for me.

Sooooo....here's my story of ire....sprinkled with my Father in law's wonderfully descriptive quips...all put into quotation marks " " so you'll know when the General has expressed himself about the subject!

Bear with me for a moment....this requires a brief bit of background, and some of this may sound as "mixed up as a dog's breakfast!"

It all starts with having a spec house on this awful market that we couldn't sell for about 4 years. We hung in and did what we thought was the right thing...to keep paying, on time....we have good credit and this was important to us. Reportedly, the "big guys" dumped their properties in this market long ago...and just more recently the average investors have struggled with whether to go to foreclosure, hand the deed over to the bank (Deed in Lieu of Foreclosure), or to do a short sale (selling the property for less than you owe the bank...with the bank's blessing and permission).

Bear with me, or "this dog won't hunt!" The order in which I listed these strategies are in the order of most, to least problematic for your credit score. But given that there were no buyers...even at short sale prices....I decided as of December of last year to opt for the Deed in Lieu of Foreclosure. We met with the bank and started drawing up the paperwork.

Then...in the eleventh hour...we got a buyer! "Holy Mackerel...and other sacred fishes!" I thought wow...we'll now be able to do a short sale and this will be better on our credit report. When I told the bank VP gleefully that we had this buyer...he said...well, there's not enough time to close before year end....so....you'll need to follow through with the Deed in Lieu of Foreclosure. What??? "Christ in the foothills!" I asked him why we should do this when we had a buyer....and that this would certainly be better for our credit. He said it was an accounting thing...that they wanted this posted on their books before year end. "Jeezle Peezle!"

I said....you mean to tell me that you're going to put a simple accounting issue before your client, one who has numerous accounts with you, has referred numerous clients to you, and is now bringing you a buyer to the table? He shifted uncomfortably....then said something about it also just being a bank regulation. I asked for him to send me this regulation in an email....I wanted to see it so I could possibly understand it. He said, no, and that this conversation was over, he didn't want to argue with me. Here's the first time that I felt that sick feeling in my stomach....one that announced to me that I was being (scr...d), and that there was an abuse of power underway. I thought it really is true that he who holds the gold makes the rules.

OK...after making some complaints, yes, the VP was overruled and we proceeded to close in January of this year. But the game wasn't over yet...because about this time, it was time to refinance the home equity loan that was needed in order to continue to pay for the spec mortgage during the recession. An awful rate...due to it being a (second mortgage) now rather than home equity...but we were reassured that since I had the new trucking job that we could refinance after 6 months of having a recovered cash flow. I thought...well OK, we'll just need to grin and bear these 6 months, and we'll go back to the table.

Well, I'm sorry to report that after going back to the table...we've now been told by the same folks who reassured us that we could refinance...no, we can't entertain a refinance within 4 years of a short sale. What?? Wasn't this pertinent information to have disclosed to us in prior negotiations? And why the reassurance....leaving out info is one thing...but giving misleading info is another! "Well if it's not one thing it's another....said the teenage girl when she got a nose bleed."

How could these people think that somehow I'd forget the prior info given, and that i wouldn't connect the dots? Somebody here "was born with a mighty tall baby chair." (Implying they had fallen out of it on their head)

I'm livid...and I'm not going to take this laying down. But, hmmmmmm.....you know, it would be a bit more relaxing.  But enjoyable?  "That dog definitely won't hunt!"

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June 3, 2012
Thanks for sharing!! Prayers go up for this situation.
June 3, 2012
Local bank that is still in business??
June 3, 2012
Yes Vicki....and without naming this institution...it's the one that you went to the Grand Canyon with....ahhhhhhh. Please don't mention here....
June 6, 2012
Yes, that is what I thought.... I've heard similar stories...
June 6, 2012
Wonderfully written, tragic story.
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