Hawaii - Maui

November 20, 2009 - Kihei, Hawaii, United States


So the McP's has spent a very pleasant week here on Maui. For a start oor condo (I know!) was the damage. Cracking wee pad right on the beachfront in Kihei on the West coast of South Maui. Confused? Read on.

Maui is an amazing place. It's like two mountains stuck together wi a wee flat strip. Ken them wee plastic spoons ye get that one half is a tablespoon and the other half is a desert spoon? Maui is like one o them upside-doon. Seriously. The tablespoon is South Maui wi a huge mountain in the middle and the desert spoon is West Maui wi a smaller mountain in the middle. Got that? (Ye'll need tae look it up - thats the best I can describe it). There are some well posh parts wi big hotel complexes and amazing golf courses, if yer intae that sorty thing. And then there are some quieter bits with sleepy wee villages and stalls selling pineapples and banana bread. Great surfing beaches, some o the most amazing scenery I've ever seen in my puff - cliffs, valleys, hills, trees, flowers, waterfalls. In short, it is as close to paradise as certainly I've ever seen. It's neither wonder the yanks felt the need tae annexe it. I mean, ye would wouldn't ye?

So we spent a fair bit o time swimming in the sea and sunbathing, seens how it is roasting here and we're right on the beach (did I mention that already?) - but also managed to cram in aw the major sightseeing activities.

We drove the Hana Highway - a twisty rollercoaster of a drive through a lush green paradise wi waterfalls and caves and blowholes and pools and...ye get the picture. Unfortunately it was bucketing doon when we did this, as ye'll notice in the photaes, so didny quite see it in all it's majesty - still pretty impressive though.

We went tae Lahaina - an auld whaling village turned tourist central - wi a giant Banyan tree in the middle that takes up a whole park. Nice wee place. In Lahaina we went tae a Lu'au which is where they gie ye one o them flowery garlands on yer way in, ply ye wi bevvy and scran then dance for ye. Sounds tacky but it was actually very good indeed with professional Hula dancers wriggling aboot the place and excellent music (ah that Hawaiian steel-string, slide guitar - a sound that just makes ye want tae leap ooto yer clothes and intae a hammock under a palm tree wi a coconut, a spoon and a bottle o rum).

We drove roond the North of West Maui and watched some surfers doing their thing. Drove past all the fancy hotels and beaches and ended up driving doon this road with what looked like a field that had just been plowed for planting tatties that turned oot tae be solidified lava, the weirdest looking stuff, before we realised that we werny allowed tae drive on that road. Oops. The car rental companies dinny let ye drive on some of the roads on Maui as they are too dodgy. So fearless Jacs drove them all in our 4WD jeep, guid lass.

We drove up this beautiful, haunting valley, 'Iao, where there wis a massacre of one tribe against another engineered wi the help o the British army and the women and children perished in the hills (sound familiar?).

On oor last day we drove up the big mountain, Haleakala (Hawaiian for tablespoon, probably) - which has a most impressive big crater, and watched the sunset while freezing oor 'okoles (arses) off at 10,000 feet. How can I describe that...ethereal? awe-inspiring? the brawness? Adjectives fail me. Check oot the pictures and videos and make up yer ain mind.

Nights were spent sitting oot under the stars (oh...the stars!) under swaying palms drinking rum (and vodka) listening tae the waves splashing against our lovely beach. Did I mention the beach? Aye...ok.

Listen we spent a few bob on this place and it was worth every penny. What a place. I dinny really want tae leave tae be honest but...the adventure continues. Hawaii is seeping intae ma soul I must say and I'm loving it. Noo...I'm nae poet so let me leave ye wi the words of one o the masters, Mr Samuel Clemens (aka Mark Twain) also a lover of these islands...

'No alien land in all the world has any deep, strong charm for me but that one; no other land could so longingly and beseechingly haunt me sleeping and waking, through half a life-time, as that one has done. Other things leave me, but it abides; other things change, but it remains the same. For me it's balmy airs are always blowing, it's summer seas flashing in the sun; the pulsing of it's surf beat is in my ear. I can see it's garlanded crags, it's leaping cascades, it's plumy palms drowsing by the shore; it's remote summits floating like islands above cloud rack. I can feel the spirit of it's woodland solitudes; I can hear the splash of it's brooks; and in my nostrils still lives the breath of it's flowers.'

And with Mark Twain's nostrils I leave you. Mahalo Maui.

Tomorrow we split for The Big Island (Hawaii) which, in the words of one of the other guests here, is 'a whole different ball game'. Volcano time. Lavatastic!



Crater than the sum of it's parts
New Moon
Wish You Were Here


November 20, 2009
I am really, really trying to be happy for you guys, but it is p1ssing down here and you are really, really starting to annoy me! Jealous - moi - NEVER!!!!!!!!!!

Seriously though, sounds amazing and your poem brought a wee tear to my eye - I am missing you both loads but glad you are having such an amazing adventure.

November 22, 2009
WOW - looks and sounds totally amazing....
If there wasn't palm trees in your pictures I would have thought you were in Dunoon though! Sounds the brawness, and I think if I ever win the lottery I'll need to check all this out for myself in case you made any of it up. Glad you're both having a rare time and taking the time to properly enjoy everything and to "smell the roses". Have ye's had many AFD's (alcohol free days) yet or is that a silly question?
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